Sandwell Valley Signs

You know, despite the awful and wasteful things that Sandwell perpetrates, it does have its redeeming features. Not many, admittedly, but they are there.

I've commented before on the wonderfully responsive traffic signals in Sandwell, and the ladies who sell the eggs at Forge Mill Farm shop are just so consistently pleasant it's worth going in to buy a few dozen even if you don't want any.

And I'm coming to admire more and more the Sandwell Special Sign Secretariat.

It has given such pleasure over the years, and has just produced another wonderful example of the art of sign making.

But let's first look at a couple of the SSSS earlier achievements.

Back in February, 2008, the SSSS caused to have erected a number of signposts around Sandwell Valley. Most of them have since been taken down, but one still proudly stands close to the boathouse at Swan Pool.

This was erected about a yard from a then existing old signpost, which old signpost seemed, to us non-expert sign makers, to be perfectly good. Sadly, but logically, after but a few weeks of co-existence, the old signpost was removed. Now, with the benefit of hindsight, this may have been something of a mistake, because the old signpost used to correctly indicate locations by pointing towards the locations concerned.

The new signpost has 2 'arms' and they point, roughly, in the opposite directions to the locations indicated.

4 years on, the signpost still stands for all to see and wonder at - still pointing in the wrong directions.

More recently (last year to be exact) the SSSS erected a sort of Welcome sign at an entrance to the Valley off Park Lane. Motorists can't drive in there and there is nowhere to park, inside or outside. Entrance is limited to persons on foot or horseback, in practically all cases, by crossing the road from the Hill Top area of the City of Birmingham.

Passing motorists cannot see the sign as it is too far back from the road, and even if they could, they couldn't get in for the reasons already given.

Pedestrians and equestrians traversing the road from Birmingham, unless hopelessly lost, would have no need for a sign telling them that they were entering Sandwell Valley, as only locals would be there on foot or horseback, and they would, hopefully, know where they were.

Therefore, having reasoned that neither motorists nor non-motorists, or put another way, nobody, can find this sign of any use, one is bound to ask why it was put there. Perhaps SSSS had bought a job lot of signs and this was one left over. Or maybe it filled in a Friday afternoon (or more likely, a couple of weeks) for one of the SSSS researchers to find somewhere that hadn't got a sign.

Whatever the reason, the opportunity was not lost, by the Sandwell Health and Safety Secretariat, to warn us that there is a road there.

Would you believe, (yes, of course you would - this is Sandwell we are talking about) that after decades and decades and decades of local people making their ways to and from the City of Birmingham, across that road, at that point, Sandwell sought, in 2011, to tell them that there was a road there!!!!!

Grief!

And so to the most recent piece of lovable sign nonsense

Why nonsense?

Because this sign, about keeping dogs under 'close control', actually makes no sense.

The sign, the only one of its kind - so far - is on the run-up to Swan Pool just by the boat house.

Swan Pool has been there for over 100 years (I have a photo of it, dated 1907, from, perhaps, the most noted historian in the Midlands so there can't be much doubt about that.)

It follows that there are likely to have been birds there for over 100 years, and also that people have probably been taking dogs for walks there for over 100 years.

Further, I can confirm that there are still lots of birds there. Admittedly I speak as an amateur in this matter and do not possess the kind of expertise for which the Sandwell inteligentia are so carefully selected, but there certainly seemed to be plenty of birds around there last time I looked.

So, one must conjecture that, whatever sort of control (close or otherwise) dog walkers have exercised over their charges during the last 100 years, it must have been adequate to ensure that the bird population was not wiped out!

Why then the need now for a sign telling people to keep their dogs under close control, and what is the significance of the added words 'Wildfowl are present in this area'?

Are these words intended simply to inform unobservant dog walkers that there are birds around, in case they fail to notice, or is there a deeper meaning to them?

Is it that these words have been used to indicate that close control of dogs is required within (unspecified) distances from the sign, because of the presence of birds - and, by implication, that beyond the (unspecified) distances, no close control of dogs is required, because there aren't any birds?

I think not.

Were that to be the case, then at the (unspecified) distances from this sign, there would be other signs saying 'It's OK to let your dogs off the lead now - there aren't any birds here.'

But there aren't any such signs.

So how can dog walkers, entering Sandwell Valley from Swan Pool car park, know where Sandwell consider it appropriate for them to cease close control of their dogs and let them off their leads?

It's a nonsense.

Now look at this from a different direction, or lots of different directions, - the Salters Lane entrance to Sandwell Valley - or any of the 4 Park Lane ones - or that from the housing estate, or Dartmouth Park; or the golf course ........

There aren't any similar signs at these locations or on any of the closer approaches to Swan Pool.

And what about Heron Pool - one of the largest heronries for miles around? There aren't any similar signs at the innumerable entrances to Heron Pool either. There are signs saying you can't swim or have inflatables (!!) or light fires etc etc, but nothing about dogs.

So, logically, Sandwell do not consider it necessary to require dog walkers to start exercising close control over their animals anywhere in Sandwell Valley except at the point where they pass the only sign making such a requirement which is on the run up to Swan Pool. And it is then only necessary if the dog walkers are walking towards the front of the sign rather than towards the back of it!

If they are walking towards the front of the sign, close control of their dogs is required everywhere in Sandwell Valley. If they are walking towards the back of it, they didn't need to exercise close control anywhere!!!!!

It's a nonsense.

You couldn't write a comedy about this, could you?

Isn't Sandwell and its Special Sign Secretariat just wonderful!

Either that, or just plain stupid for continuing to waste time and money needlessly and thoughtlessly.

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